Remember Tana Goertz? Yeah, well, I didn’t either. So why am I even writing about her? Well, as it turns out, this lovely I-am-woman,-watch-me-sell-you-a-used-car mug was on the third season of The Apprentice. Naturally, she was fired. And under normal circumstances, such a dismissal would would generally bring her 15 minutes of fame to a merciful end. And for those of us who don’t watch The Apprentice (myself included), we would never have even heard of her, and would have been much better off for it.
But, it appears Tana refuses to gracefully let go of the limelight. She of course has her own tacky website (warning: it is annoyingly tacky, down to the embedded audio clip that plays upon loading the page).
And, she’s still haunting television. How low will the Queen of tack stoop? Apparently, quite low, as she’s now hocking the tackiest of all infomercial wares: The Bedazzler.
Oh, yes! She took the indignity of being fired by the world’s worst entrepenuer, and submitted to even worse indiginities by pushing the “art” of embedding cheap plastic shiny bits into clothing, thereby making it possible to really argue that getting fired by The Donald isn’t all that bad, by comparison.
So now, she invades the late night TV I watch on nights when I can’t immediately get to sleep, whoring her li’l heart out as she’s telling me about how wonderful it is to make my jeans replusively tacky by encrusting fake colored plastic jewels and tin. And the sad thing is that people will actually buy this crap!
Oh well… at least she didn’t turn into a professional spammer.