So, somewhere in Florida a 480 pound woman sat on her couch for a total of, believe it or not, six years. And what happens when someone does that sort of thing? Evidently, the couch pretty much attaches to your ass. And yes, boys and girls, such a condition is apparently very lethal:
STUART, Fla. — A 480-pound Martin County woman has died after emergency workers tried to remove her from the couch where she had remained for about six years.
Gayle Laverne Grinds, 40, died Wednesday, after a failed six-hour effort to dislodge her from the couch in her home. Workers say the home was filthy, and Grinds was too large to get up from the couch to even use the bathroom.
No, the conditions inside the home of a human being in such a state are not going to be pretty.
So, you think maybe she was someone who had no family or friends, and so ended up falling through the cracks, so to speak? Oh no! She was living with someone…
Investigators say Grinds lived with a man named Herman Thomas, who says he tried to take care of her the best he could. He has told them he tried repeatedly to get her up, but simply couldn’t.
And so he let it go FOR SIX YEARS?! I don’t know about you, but I’d say after, oh, the third month at least, I’d start to worry and start calling for help, don’t ya think?
There are photos. No, I’m not posting them here. The description alone is quite gross enough.
Special thanks (dubious as such an honor may be) to onezumi for providing the link. Using my mad google skillz[tm], I was able to find a more comprehensive news story, not that such gruel would interest any of you.
What a horrible way to go.
I don’t know if you should thank me or puke.
Perhaps this could’ve been all avoided, had she bought the newer model couch with the built-in ejector seat options.